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Friday, July 8, 2011

Anonymous is back!

I received this LOVELY comment on this post (which I find strangely ironic.  It's like anonymous is going for the gold!)

"dude, f*** this blog. I Mean Everything about This blog sucks Hardcore And Nobody, no One, Likes you."

First of all, why is grammar such a big problem for this person?  It's getting predictable.  I don't know who Nobody is, or who One is, but I'm assuming they are people because I don't know why else they would be capitalized.  Unless this comment is a cleverly worded code.  It's like a game!  An insert-your-own-punctuation-marks-game!

"...dude, f*** this blog.  I.  Mean.  Everything about.  This blog sucks.  Hardcore.  And.  Nobody, no.  One,.  Likes you."

When you read it that way, it's much nicer.

Secondly, people like me.  My mom likes me.  My mom loves me.  So take that, anonymous.  I think we can both agree that you stand CORRECTED, my friend.

I'm assuming this is your response to my offer to hug you.  I'm sorry.  Maybe you don't like close personal contact. I can see that we're going to continue to have problems, you and I.  In the future, please send all complaints to my house handwritten on 4x6 colored cards.  Fuchsia is preferable, but not required.  If you can name all the countries in Africa, you get bonus points.  Can I borrow your pen?  I left mine in the car.

I love you, anonymous.  I love you so much.

13 comments:

  1. Oh Megan, YOU SHOW THEM.

    I love how you handle hurtful anonymous comments. I get a few myself, although none of them has that big of a Nasty factor.

    And your blog has always been interesting to read. Keep writing. (:

    ReplyDelete
  2. Erock the troll hunterJuly 8, 2011 at 6:44 PM

    I find it funny that he keeps getting on here and checking. That shows that either 1)He has nothing better to do than to get on a blog that "sucks Hardcore" (whoever that is...) that is written by a girl that "Nobody" and "One" doesn't like! Trollolololololollllllll!

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  3. I love you Megan. U lyke srsly crack me UP.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I don't know if you ever read Cracked, but the amount of time some of them spend--just within their own columns--reacting in advance to comments and using nasty emails as examples reveals that there are just always going to be people who hate something. Any given thing, no matter the content or value.
    "Everybody had their doubts
    So they tried to pull me under
    Every time I felt the strain
    Someone sent a sense of wonder"
    -Transatlantic, a symphonic prog band

    ReplyDelete
  5. I don't care what other anons say. I love this blog and would like a hug.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I just barely got my first hater comments on my youtube channel. I wore it as a badge of honor. I'm officially both good enough and famous enough to have people hate me! It feels a little good in a terrible way doesn't it? :p Love your blog. Glad my friend Chad showed it to me!!

    ReplyDelete
  7. OMMMMMGOOSHSHHHHH.

    It IS a cleverly worded code! Look! Look at the capitalized letters! Anonymous' bumbling sentence structure gives it all away as intentional!

    I Mean Everything about This blog sucks Hardcore And Nobody, no One, Likes you."
    =
    I M E T H A N O L

    This could mean one of several things:
    I met Hanol (Who's Hanol?)
    I Methanol (Poor grammar. Perhaps Anonymous is plotting to poison you! Be careful!)
    I'm Ethan O. L. (Do you know anyone by this name? If yes, case solved!)
    I'm Ethanol (The most promising option as explained below.)

    Unless you do, in fact, know some jerk named Ethan, Anonymous is clearly using this coded message to portray a deep metaphor for the despair and hopelessness brought on by the vice of drinking. By adopting the persona of drinking alcohol, he shows how alcohol despises everything and everyone of value. In excess, it will bring you down to the depths of misery and all-around-patheticness of trolling lame put-downs on the most awesome blogs on the internet.

    ...I feel SO ninja right now. XD

    ReplyDelete
  8. have you ever read Paper Towns by John Green?
    It'll explain the capitalizing
    DFTBA

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  9. YOU SHOW 'EM MEAGAN! :D

    Additionally;

    I. LoVe UrZ bloGz Lyk Seriously And People MoSt Of TheM LyK U Keep BloggINg

    ReplyDelete
  10. Well megan I love your blog, so that means I love you, but thats weird cause I'm a girl and you are a girl. So I'm gonna like you just a lot :)

    Anonymous FTW!

    ReplyDelete
  11. I'm Anonymous but I love you Megan more than I love baby seals. <3 Also I'm really starved for some hugs. Can I have that one that the other Anonymous didn't want? I'll also totally let you borrow my pen. :D What color do ya want?

    ReplyDelete
  12. It's awesome how you've handled it and made it so funny!

    ReplyDelete
  13. I feel as if we are unknowingly best friends. Your blog is cool. Real cool.

    ReplyDelete

Commenting on my blog prevents all types of cardiovascular diseases. Also, all other diseases. And it summons unicorns. So, really, why WOULDN'T you comment?